John Arnold Marsyla's Obituary
The English language offers many ways to describe unwavering bravery: Courage, resilience, defiance, grit. The Finns distill this quality to a single word, Sisu. Sisu both defined and governed the life of John Arnold Marsyla, characterizing not only his five-year battle with cancer, but the stoic and graceful manner in which he faced whatever life had in store. John, 83, passed away January 12 at his home in Walnut Creek, California. In his final weeks, John’s wife, Rae Joyce, was constantly by his side. They were frequently surrounded by their children, grandchildren and other loved ones as his cancer journey drew to a close. John was born December 4, 1939, in Cook, Minnesota, to Arnold John and Lillian Emily (Terska) Marsyla, both of Finnish descent. The family lived for a time on a farm in Linden Grove, at the confluence of the timber and iron mining industries. His childhood was not an easy one, but it engendered a deep resilience and fortitude, as well as a commitment to seek a good education and the opportunities it would afford. John went on to attend historic Duluth Central High School, where he served as class president. After high school, he studied at several universities in Minnesota, Arizona, Illinois, and Ohio, ultimately earning a Ph.D. in English from Kent State University. John met fellow student Sandra Weinberg at University of Minnesota, Duluth, and the couple married in 1962. They had two children, Kira and David, while living in Illinois and Ohio, respectively. Prompted by a scarcity of college teaching jobs in the 1970s, the family returned to Minnesota in 1975, living in Edina and Eagan. John worked in a succession of communications roles in the Twin Cities. The couple divorced in 1981. While employed at the agribusiness company Cenex, John met Rae Joyce (Cook) Kuhne. The two wed in 1986, beginning a 36-year marriage that created not only a blended family of Marc, Paul, Kira, Michelle and David, but also a circle of lifelong friends. The couple made their home in Inver Grove Heights and, subsequently, Woodbury, Minnesota. The word “inseparable” was often used to describe the couple, who shared a strong commitment to establishing and maintaining close family ties and meaningful friendships, across generations, time and distance, throughout their long marriage. Gratitude was a theme in their marriage as well, a sentiment expressed frequently in thought, word and deed. John returned to teaching in the early 1980s. He taught English courses at the University of St. Thomas and Metropolitan State University, and later became a faculty member of Inver Hills Community College in Inver Grove Heights, Minnesota, for nearly 15 years. Upon his retirement from Inver Hills in 2000, the couple moved to the Florida Gulf Coast, first to Fort Myers, and then Bonita Springs. They made their home in Florida for more than a decade, discovering beach life, sailing and many new friends while enduring Hurricanes Charley, Ivan, Jeanne, Dennis and Wilma. In 2011, seeking to be closer to family in the West, they relocated to Walnut Creek, California, settling at the Rossmoor retirement community in Northern California’s Tice Valley. The couple made new and meaningful connections at Rossmoor. John enjoyed playing tennis with fellow residents and led a Rossmoor Great Books Foundation discussion group. He was known for bringing a collaborative spirit to the book selections and discussions. John and Rae Joyce enjoyed the arts community in the region, including concerts performed by the California Symphony. John served as a docent for Bedford Gallery at Lesher Center for the Arts. They were active members of the non-denominational spiritual community Unity of Walnut Creek. Life in Northern California afforded more opportunities to visit with children Kira, Michelle and David and their families, who made their homes in nearby Oakland, San Francisco and Woodside, respectively. The couple made frequent trips to Minnesota and Florida to see extended family and to maintain and strengthen old friendships. John and Rae Joyce loved to travel, taking several cruises and making memorable trips to England and France. A highlight was the couple’s 2016 trip to Sweden, accompanied by their children and friends, to celebrate Rae Joyce’s 80th birthday. They took advantage of this time in Scandinavia to visit Finland, John’s ancestral home. Among the many passions of John’s life was sailing, a pastime he pursued in Florida and later shared with his son, David, in California. John had a lifelong love of poetry, and in 2018 published Dancing with the Crab, Poems about a Cancer Journey. It could be said that his appreciation for poetry as a unique expression of feelings and ideas extended to other realms of art, including the storytelling of the classic American western, which he enjoyed in both film and literature. He had special appreciation for the books of Louis L’Amour and the movies of Clint Eastwood. John possessed a delightful sense of humor that emphasized classic punchlines and dry delivery. He was known to clip newspaper comic strips to mail to a grandchild, and he had a penchant for retelling timeless jokes. Those who knew John well never tired of listening to him laugh uncontrollably while sharing his favorite joke about a duck seeking to buy Chapstick at a local drug store. The clerk inquires how he will pay. “Just put it on my BILL,” replies the duck. In addition to his wife, Rae Joyce, John is survived by the couple’s children Kira Marsyla (Mark) Spearman of Sacramento; David (Jenni Farrell) Marsyla of Woodside, California; Michelle Kuhne of San Francisco; Paul Kuhne, of Phoenix; along with 13 grandchildren and 13 great grandchildren. He is also survived by siblings Jim Marsyla (Judy) of Billings, Montana; Edward Marsyla of Corpus Christi, Texas; and Margaret (Bill) Faanes of North Richland Hills, Texas. John was preceded in death by the couple’s son, Marc, and John’s former wife, Sandra. A celebration of John’s life will be held at 1:00 p.m. PST on March 4, 2023, at Unity of Walnut Creek, 1871 Geary Road, Walnut Creek, California. You can also watch a livestream at either of these links: www.youtube.com/unityofwalnutcreek or www.unityofwalnutcreek.org/watch-live
Donations in John’s memory may be made to the American Cancer Society, Cancer Research Institute or Great Books Foundation.
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