Dora Mary Flaim's Obituary
DORA MARY FLAIM July 2, 1913-April 20, 2013
Born in Hoboken, New Jersey, July 2, 1913, Dora Flaim was the 8th of 9 children born to Amadeus and Mary (Fellin) Flaim and the last living member of her immediate family. Dora passed away quietly in her sleep on April 20, 2013, only two months before her 100th birthday. Of all her family, Dora was unique for her free spirit, ambition, intelligence and sophistication. She had a very successful career, working for the Federal Government, first in New York and then Washington D.C. for the FBI, and then in San Francisco where she worked for the U.S. Civil Service 33 years, rising to Chief of Investigations of the Western United States.
Dora's father, Amadeus Flaim, came from the Val di Non region of South Tyrol in Austria, an area known for growing apples. He was originally a watchmaker, but after migrating to America he first worked in the coal mines of Pennsylvania. After several years, Dora's mother and brothers joined him. He then then worked in Peekskill, NY as an engineer helping build the New York Aqueduct and later moved to Hoboken, NJ where he worked as an explosives expert building the Holland Tunnel. He was injured and eventually died from a blast that occurred during work on the tunnel. Before his death, he decided to move his family out of the city to a small farm in Chepatchet, R.I., with an apple orchard reminiscent of those in his native Tyrol. After his death, Dora's mother was left to raise their nine children on the farm in Chepatchet where Dora resided until finishing grammar school. She then moved to her older sister Regina's home in the Bronx, in order to attend high school in New York City. Dora had an incessant love for travel which was evidenced by her early experience in the 1930's of driving cross country from her home in Rhode Island to California and back in a Model A Ford with her sister Polly and friend Pearl Boyd in her mid-20's, something that was unusual for a single woman in those days. This experience was followed later by repeated trips to Europe, and travel to many countries in South America and Africa throughout her life.
Dora's Sister Edna moved to California before World War II, and convinced Dora to move her mother and three sisters to California after the war. They first lived together on Lester Avenue in Piedmont and later moved to Montgomery Street where they lived until her mother's death in 1959. Initially, Dora worked for a short time running a restaurant with her sister Polly which belonged to her sister Edna's husband, Reuben Cox. The restaurant was in Oakland, on 19th St., and was called Boosters. Soon Dora went back to work for the Federal Government, this time for the U.S. Civil Service, where she had a very successful career in a field dominated in those days by men. One of her closest colleagues at work was William (Bill) Rice, who became a lifelong friend. Dora's successful career enabled her and her sisters, Regina (Ena), Pauline (Polly) and Valeria (Val) to move to a lovely home on Golden Gate Avenue in Oakland with a view of San Francisco and the Bay. In 1958 she visited her family in South Tyrol, which was annexed to Italy after World War I, and toured a good part of Europe. Like her mother and sisters, Dora was a devout Catholic and managed to be present in Rome for a benediction by Pope Pius XII. She returned to Europe in 1961 with her three sisters and niece, Brenda, and took a year's sabbatical to tour all of the British Isles, the Continent and the Middle East. This was followed by trips during vacations from work to exotic destinations such as Macchu Pichu in the Andes, the Amazon River, and Kenya, Tanzania and Uganda in East Africa in the 1970's. The four sisters remained in Oakland until Dora's retirement in 1977 at the age of 65. During this time and thereafter, she was the head of the household and although all worked to support the family, Dora took responsibility for running the household and keeping the sisters safe and secure together. Except for several years when Val lived alone, the four lived together for the rest of their lives, and were never married.
After their retirement they decided to move to the small town of Sebastopol, CA, in an area known for growing apples, much as in Rhode Island in their childhood. The motivation came largely from Polly who loved growing and gardening, and they turned their half acre in to a beautiful flower and vegetable garden area including a bountiful apple tree. Dora also worked with carpenters to add rooms to the house and with the help of Bill Rice they built two additional buildings in the back yard. During this time Dora continued to travel, returning to Rhode Island and Connecticut to visit her brothers and sisters there, as well as trips to Europe and Hawaii, cruises through the Panama Canal, around South America, the Caribbean and Alaska. She particularly enjoyed visiting her many cousins in Europe, including Guido Fellin, Maria Assunta Cologna and Giovanni Fellin and their families, and Gerda Güntensperger, and her family. During this time she also made many friends in the Sebastopol area and hosted family from the East and from Europe who all knew that she enjoyed a sip of Scotch at cocktail time and was always happy to share a little with them. Dora lived in Sebastopol until her sisters passed away, and after Polly's death in 2009, she moved to Los Angeles, CA with her niece Brenda. She spent her last years there still enjoying life to the fullest and sharing her beautiful smile with everyone around her.
Dora will be remembered by all who knew her as a woman filled with the excitement of life, energetic and adventurous, smart and well organized, and in her later years, full of wonderful stories about her life and times. Her greatest ambition was not for herself but for others, and she was always ready to help anyone she encountered. She was there for her mother and sisters throughout their lives and was ready to sacrifice her personal goals when it was necessary in order to help her sisters or anyone in her family in need. She had a warm heart, a beautiful spirit and a giving nature that will be remembered by everyone whose lives she touched.
Dora is survived by her nieces Aileen Natale, Emma Bonvicin, Louise Gifford, Carolyn Flaim, and Brenda Cox Wilson, and her nephews, Milton Flaim, Warren Cox, and Randall Cox. Her funeral will be held April 27, 2013, at 11:00 AM at the Chapel of the Chimes, 4499 Piedmont Avenue, Oakland, CA, with a burial ceremony following at 1:00 PM at St. Mary's Cemetery, 4529 Howe Street, Oakland CA.
Reception Luncheon will be held at the Claremont Hotel, Monterey Room,
41 Tunnel Rd., Berkeley, CA 94705 at 2:00pm
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